I’m a big boy now
Did a deer today
Nearly got away
But I took him down

With shotgun cocked
I’m king o’ the hill
And my kingdom grows
With the blood I spill

Regie’s gotta rifle
Shakes a trifle
Tommy’s gotta tank
Better than a wank

Peter’s gotta pistol
Nerves of crystal
Norm’s gotta knife
Gonna save his life

Gordon’s gotta gun
A really big one
Then here comes Gus
With his blunderbuss

Simon’s gotta sword
Like a dread overlord
Craig’s gotta catapult
Thinks he’s in a cult

Now playtime’s done
They all go home
No longer local
Fields to roam

It’s time for tea
Then say good night
Run up to bed
Turn off the light

Mummy’s little hunter
Tucked uptight
Kiss on the brow
Gonna be alright

Sleep well, dear
Is her final word
But the ceiling heard
And the shadows leer